Won’t Walk In Circles Reflection
Welcome to the Psalms of Our Lives series. In the ‘Won’t Walk In Circles’ episode, I will share my story and song of praise about what it means to find your purpose in the Lord.
Mental health challenges are invisible infirmities we may or may not have control over. So many people struggle with mental health challenges, which can be a minor or debilitating experience. I believe that each person has some degree of mental health challenges. When I was in grade school, I was diagnosed with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). The nuns at the catholic school I attended insisted that I should be put on medication (Ritalin). I always struggled to be still, and my focus was aligned with the ‘hey look, squirrel’ meme. My mother, who worked at the school at the time, was strong and disagreed with the recommendation to medicate me at such a young age. Her remedy was to send me to spend the summer with my grandmother, Ma Vernie, on the island of Antigua. Ma Vernie was a strict Seventh-day Adventist. On Fridays at 6:00 PM, we went dark. Saturday was spent in church and worship until 6:00 PM. That shift in discipline was difficult, but I believe it helped to bring about a calm for the anxiousness that I was experiencing. Another factor was a sister named Tracy in Ma Vernie’s church. She helped improve my reading and comprehension by allowing me to read comic books like Archie and Jughead. When I did not know the meaning of words, she gave me a dictionary to help me find the meaning. I became a better student by reading the Bible and comic books.
However, the struggle was not over; I spent the following summer with Ma Vernie because I became disruptive as a 6th grader. I followed the example of a group of older boys who made me believe I was a man, and I tried to behave like a man when I was just a boy. The result was that I got to repeat the 6th grade because my behavior was not mature enough to advance to 7th grade. My mother agreed to set boundaries for me, which taught me humility. I was so embarrassed by this failure. I returned the following year as an honor roll student and determined to be a better citizen. In 2009, the year before my mom died, I asked my mother why she had agreed to let me repeat the 6th grade. She responded that I was too immature and needed time to grow into the man that I am.
Truth in the Word of God: Philippians 4:6-7 NIV. “6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 NIV
I experienced the power of God’s word to guide my thoughts and life. Realizing I did not have to walk in circles; there was already a paved way for me. I wrote the song ‘Won’t Walk In Circles’ and published it in my book, Prayers to My Abba Father God. The words to help me express my declaration follow:
I won’t walk in circles
Chase the world
Feeling restless
Jesus knows what’s best for me
Only He knows
I won’t walk in circles
Chase the world
Feeling hopeless
He rose and paved a path for me
He loves me so; I am free
I won’t walk in circles
I won’t walk in circles
Signing, mm, mm,
Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah
Pray: Abba Father God, I am lost in this world of deception and distraction without you. It is so easy to chase the world and end up in a place feeling hopeless. Christ, alive in me, is my hope and glory. Colossians 1:27 ERV: “God decided to let his people know just how rich and glorious that truth is. That secret truth, which is for all people, is that Christ lives in you, his people. He is our hope for glory.” Colossians 1:27 ERV. In Jesus name, Amen.
Take A Moment To Reflect:
- When was the last time you experienced the feeling of being anxious and hopeless?
- How did prayer and counsel with other believers help you find peace?
Until next time, create space to connect with your Abba, Father, God, and:
- Be Aware: I am lost without God’s presence.
- Be in Gratitude: I am so lucky that I was chosen to be your friend and child.
- Be Praising: Sing a song of praise. Speak openly with your Abba Father God.
Be Blessed, Beloved